Saturday, May 25, 2013

oh cadnana, when will it be spring?

As far as doing anything is concerned it appears I've spent almost the entire month of May making small beaded objects. I have no idea how this happened  but when you're either fogged or rained in for long periods, well beyond the time that spring was supposed to have arrived and settled in, things can get a little crazy. Just to show you how silly I've become this past month I'll share with you a list of the benefits of living in the Canadian provinces sent to me by a friend who left Canada and moved to Arizona.


1. Vancouver has 2 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
2. Your $500,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
3. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
4. "Weed".


1. There are big rocks between you and B.C.
2. Tax is 5% instead of the approximately 200% as it is for the rest of the country.
3. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
4. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
5. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.


1. You never run out of wheat.
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
4. People will assume you live on a farm.
5. Daylight savings time? Who the hell needs that!

1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property..
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.


1. You live in the centre of the universe.
2. Your $500,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.


This is a tough one.
1. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
2. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada
3. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo A*#!%!" ?


1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
2. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick ...
3. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.


1. Everyone can play the fiddle.. The ones who can't, think they can.
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray ever made money.


1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island , you still have the big new bridge.
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
4. It's where all those tiny, red potatoes come from..
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.


1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
2. The workday is about two hours long.
3. It is socially acceptable to wear hip waders to your wedding.

All this followed by a film about the real Canada:

Now that I seemed to have developed a case of carpal elbow syndrome I'm packing up the beads and will return to normal drawing activity in the very near future.

Happy Memorial Day to my American friends and good wishes to all for better weather.

ps: I've also been working on a website gallery page since it's in the nature of blogs that everything disappears faster than I'd prefer. Hmm, reminds me of life.


Rob-bear said...

susan: you're not supposed to tell the world about Bears getting their fur coats cleaned. Makes us look like wusses, which we are assuredly not.

Thoroughly enjoyed your picture gallery! Thanks for sharing.

Blessings and Bear hugs!
Bears Noting
Life in the Urban Forest (poetry)

marja-leena said...

Oh, oh, I've got a stitch in my side from laughing so much! That bear one tops them all!

Love your beaded necklace! And your work looks just fantastic in your new gallery, Susan. How do you like weebly?

I'm still waiting for mine to be finished after a year of fiddling and changing and waiting for my designers to have the time...

susan said...

We all know bears don't need washing machines to keep their coats clean. Among my favorite movies is one called The Bear that I think all non-bears should be required to see. Besides, it's beautiful.

Glad you liked the pictures.

susan said...

There's quite a bit of truth in that list, isn't there? The bear movie made me laugh too and I knew it was just right when I saw it take my husband by surprise.

I'm pleased you like the necklace. I'm working on a method of taking decent photographs of the beaded pieces so I can post them to the web too. It's not as easy as the 2D paintings. Weebly is a pretty cool website builder for the non-tech user; I know because I've attempted to use a few others. Naturally, they recommend upgrading which I'll probably do since I couldn't post hi-res pictures on this free version. The site does need work but I was so delighted to finally have something I just hit the publish button and linked.

Your exquisite work deserves an equally elegant website. I hope your designers can provide it sooner rather than later.

Lydia said...

Your necklace is exquisite, Susan! No surprise that your beading would be true art. I had an interest in trying to copy two Christmas ornaments that belonged to my grandmother, probably dating back to the late 1800s. I love them and was so excited to try to reproduce them for family/friends. But I never did anything with the idea. Alas.

The list is hilarious. Laughed hard about the bridge joke in B.C. and Prince Edward Island. Just really funny stuff. Sorry about your late spring. Ours is all liquid the last weeks.

I'll have to share that video on my facebook page. It totally "got" me!

Sean Jeating said...

Nice necklace, Susan, and a glorious gallery. Just glorious.

Well, and Canada. One has to bear it. Obviously.

linda said...

well apparently i have to sign into google now to leave a comment... nonsense complete. i did think to copy my original comment but i keep having a harder time leaving comments on blogger blogs. what's with that... grumble etc...

well-here's what i did say..
well... so many things to say and a fried brain does not a decent reply make... that video is hilarious! and i was totally sucked in .. :) the why not live in canada stuff was also great... and probably(for the most part) very true. i know very little about our neighbor to the north having only been to BC(course...) and yours and GFID's experiences. makes me definitely want to stay on my part of the planet tho. big surprise there, no? :)

your gallery is looking stupendous! your art just pops and one can really see your style and feel the energy of them. i loved it. made me want to do that too... your necklace is beautiful. you do such fine work, it astounds me. i bet you can't move your wrist now! neither can i for entirely inane reasons... well, wish me luck. is spring there yet? xox

susan said...

I'm glad you like the necklace, Lydia. It's amazing that once we examine older pieces like the ornaments you mention, we discover they are often a lot more complicated than they first appear.

I think my favorite on that list was the line about Saskatchewan where you can watch your dog run away for hours. I only saw it from the ground by train once but that seemed to be true.

The video got me too. Hopefully, your FB friends will enjoy it.

susan said...

I'm pleased you enjoyed seeing them. There may be more added if I'm not bored yet.

Yes, where we are is where we do, isn't it?

susan said...

Huh, every so often I find I've been signed out of google too so you're not alone. I really have taken to writing most of my comments off-line or copying them before I hit the publish button. I'm sorry you've had this trouble though and I always wonder what you said first :)

The video was perfectly done - a couple of seamless transitions made it very realistic overall. Nah, you wouldn't want to be here year round (except perhaps when it comes to medical care) - this spring has been the worst we've seen.

I'm delighted you like the electronic portfolio (I hesitate to call it a gallery since I really don't know what I'm doing). Still, it's nice to see so many at once even though none are in hi-res yet. Next trick will be to figure out how to take consistently decent pictures of the beaded things. It's very hard for me to do as parts tend to shine too much.

I do wish you luck and better health, my friend.

gfid said...

you make such lovely things :0) happy sigh. so this is what bears do when they hit the laundramat. my dad used to say each summer, "i hope summer comes on a Sunday this year, so i don't have to work through all of it." finally warming here, with a wee bit of much needed rain last year. @ MH my wood violets, forget-me-nots and icelandic poppies have begun to bloom. the one lone white tulip that survived the many prior years of neglect has finished its bloom and is dropping petals. summer blessings.

gfid said...

.... rain was last night.... not last year....

susan said...

Thanks, I'm happy you like them. Your dad's comment about summers where you live is a bittersweet one. Still, I'm glad you've had some rain at long last for that beautiful garden that's returning to life under your ministrations.
May your summer last at least a long weekend.

Tom said...

Susan: The bear film was brilliant! Had us both chuckling.

Life As I Know It Now said...

Here's hoping you get some decent weather so you can get out and reconnect with the natural world. Just don't run into any bears while out and about! :)

susan said...

I'm delighted to know you both enjoyed a happy welcome to phantsythat.

susan said...

The weather's finally turned out to be beautiful just in time for long walks while the work crew spend their days making a mess right outside our windows (while we still have them, that is).

There are quite a few bears in NS but happily not in the parks we usually frequent.

Don QuiScottie said...

Wow. That lovely beady thing... You must have a lot of patience (or eight hands)

susan said...

Thank you, Don. I take great pleasure in making unnecessary things for their own sake. I'm happy to know seeing this one pleased you.

Don QuiScottie said...

"I take great pleasure in making unnecessary things for their own sake"

I do too, now I come to think of it, with a few hours spent writing rubbish every day.

susan said...

A well made cup of tea is always a good bet.

Gina Duarte said...

Though I know it's not wave-a-wand type magic, but instead a lot of work and concentration, your hands are magical.

susan said...

Thank you, my friend.