Monday, July 24, 2017
life's little lessons
Some young neighbours of a retired couple asked them what they did to keep life interesting.
The elderly man answered, "Well, the other day my wife and I went into town and into a shop. We were only in there for about five minutes but when we came out, there was a policeman writing out a parking ticket.
"We went up to him and my wife said, 'Come on sir, how about giving us pensioners a break?' He ignored us and continued writing the ticket.
"So I called him a fascist bastard. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tyres. Then my wife called him a total pillock. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windscreen with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket. We continued to call him names and he just kept writing those tickets.
"This went on for about 10 minutes, and then our bus arrived."
“I have a hobby. I have the world’s largest collection of sea shells. I keep it scattered on beaches all over the world. Maybe you’ve seen some of it.”
“I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time" so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.”
“Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.”
“I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.” *
― Steven Wright
* (remind you of anyone?)