Sunday, December 9, 2007

I used to be disgusted

now I try to be amused. My wings have gotten rusted and the angels have stolen my red shoes. Elvis Costello is surely one of the best song writers of our generation and his "Shipbuilding' explains much about our common history. I thought about posting a link to it but it's easily found on youtube if you're interested.

The picture posted here is part of our collection and was found during the last presidential election. It seemed pretty apt then and perhaps even more so now since a lot of my American friends have expressed interest in moving to Canada - including us considering moving back someday. The problem for us and for some among our Canadian friends is that most of the country - global warming or not - is so damn cold most of the year. The islands of British Columbia are lovely and the weather is milder there than anywhere else but it's not Orange County. Toronto is huge and has spread like a fungal infection of housing developments and strip malls across the remembered farmland and woods of my childhood. Imagine, if you can, Los Angeles with snow and ice seven months of the year and you'll have a close approximation. Montreal is great and even has underground access to most of the downtown buildings but the only French speakers most Quebecois will converse with are native born ones. I don't even want to think about living in any of the Prairie provinces since winters there make Minnesota and N. Dakota look balmy. The Maritimes can be compared to Vermont and New Hampshire but colder, damper and darker by the time November rolls around and the ice doesn't break til May. Brrrrr

Therefore, I think we should start a petition to switch around some of the unnatural lines drawn on political maps. After all, a map is not a landscape. The problems of having an Electoral College decide the presidency would be moot since we'd have a parliament and as many 3rd, 4th and 5th party candidates who felt like climbing on a soapbox (what's a soapbox?). The Canadians could enjoy a warmer retirement and we could all use some free health care. Anybody feel like contacting Michael Moore?

11 comments:

  1. I'm in full support of annexing "Jesusland."

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  2. I agree. It would save on a lot of moving expenses.

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  3. Tread lightly dear Canadian. Leviticus 25:44 clearly states that I may possess slaves, both male and female as long as they are from neighboring nations. Mr. Bush claims this applies only to Mexicans, but sources say he often looks at the map and licks his chops. Don't you guys have oil anyway? How you doing in the weapons of mass destruction department?

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  4. I'll work for it in Canada, as long as we can ask the Pacific coast and Baja parts of Mexico to join in. Then we're cooking!

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  5. Madame,

    Methinks you are too negative in regard to the climate in the Maritime provinces. Spring comes there at about the same time as it does in Southern Ontario.

    But ha ha. Global warming is playing a funny joke on the Maritimes and New England. As Greenland melys, the Gulf Stream weakens and a mini ice age threatens.

    Still, Halifax is a hip town and very left wing.

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  6. Lol. I love your map. I would bet California would vote to join Canada if given the chance. But would Canada play along???

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  7. Kathie, Canada does indeed have oil but it's not the dig a hole kind which is ugly and untidy enough. Instead, it's hundred of square miles of tar sands in the west which the Canadians and Americans are already ploughing into an unholy mess to extract a nasty, heavy crude. It's not good.

    Gary, If you check the map it appears to drop into your favorite winter seascape.

    Drowsey, All borders are strictly political. We're all friends together.

    Okay Mackinaw, I'll grant you spring comes to the Maritimes in mid-May then.

    Sera, I'm sure the Canadians would go for it just so they could come and visit you in sunny California.

    Scarlet, You're on!

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  8. Holy crap. I stole this from Dusty who stole it from Dan, I think, who must have stolen it from you. Please except my apologies.

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  9. People should read this.

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